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Category: Adoption

Adoption, Encouragement, Forgotten Fridays, Foster ParentingNov. 16, 2018

Forgotten Friday | From Orphan to Co-Heir

There is a type of adoption, a compassionate offering, where a mom chooses something different for her child. She places her baby in the loving care of another family, wrapped in a prayer of hope for the future. I have witnessed this up close, in the life of a dear friend, and there are few things more selfless and beautiful. Sometimes the brokenness of divorce leads to adoption. A blending of families creates the opportunity for step-parents to love and raise children as their “own.” I have experienced this and am very thankful for those relationships. Out of God’s great […]

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Adoption, Children in Foster Care, Forgotten Fridays, Foster ParentingNov. 2, 2018

Forgotten Friday | Behind Closed Doors

Have you ever held a broken child in your arms as they cried out for their mommy, hoping, wishing, praying you could do anything to take the pain away? Have you ever tried brushing the teeth of a 2-year- old who screamed in pain because every tooth was decayed due to the neglect they faced at the very hands of their own parents? Have you ever had to sit down two children, both under the age of 5, and explain to them how their mommy is in jail and you have no idea when she’ll be out? Each and every […]

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Adoption, Encouragement, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference MondaysOct. 29, 2018

Make a Difference Monday | Will My Husband Ever Be on the Same Page as Me with Adoption?

It’s not always the case, but often, men can be the toughest nut to crack when it comes to the adoption journey. I know from personal experience. There are a few reasons why this happens, and some key steps you can take to eventually arrive at the same place with him on this journey. Back in the day, before we got married, I said no to just about everything. In fact, if shaking my head was an Olympic sport, I would have taken the gold. I was such a difficult person to get along with in those days. One of […]

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Adoption, Children in Foster Care, Forgotten Fridays, Foster Parenting, Vulnerable ParentsOct. 26, 2018

Forgotten Friday | Walking Through Adoption Loss

While driving to Red Robin on a date with my 9-year-old, I could tell he wasn’t his jolly self. I couldn’t quite read his expression and for fear of driving off the road while trying, I determined to wait until we stopped. It was then that I could get a good look into his eyes. “What’s wrong, buddy?” I asked. You see, we had been discussing adoption and his birth parents a little bit before. He looked away, leaned into the side of the car and the tears spilled out. Adoption starts with loss. This child came to us as […]

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Adoption, Children in Foster Care, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference MondaysOct. 22, 2018

Make a Difference Monday | Can I ask you something? (Part 4)

Where are you on adoption? Honestly, we’re exactly where we were the last time you asked. The government moves at its own plodding pace; we just have to be patient (and it’s not always easy). In some ways, I think it’s been good for L. to have more time to process his adoption. In other ways, the drawn-out transition has been hard on both of us. Of course, once things are finalized, we’re going to Disney World, and that can’t happen soon enough for either of us! When can you say what happened to him/show his face/share his full name? […]

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Adoption, Encouragement, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference MondaysSep. 17, 2018

Make a Difference Monday | Everyone Has a Story: Heartbreak and Hope, Part 2

(To read part one, click here) “She changed her mind.” I couldn’t believe it. I knew that this was so very common in domestic adoptions and yet, in this case, baby boy would immediately be put into the foster care system, and his mom did not want this. She had shared this with me before, yet she changed her mind. And her decision was final. I looked over at my friends who were standing outside the nursery. With so many emotions in my heart and tears in my eyes, I slowly walked to them and told them that it seemed like […]

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Adoption, Children in Foster Care, Forgotten Fridays, Foster ParentingJun. 15, 2018

Forgotten Friday | 7 Things You Should Never Say to Foster or Adoptive Dads on Father’s Day

This coming Sunday is Father’s Day. While most of the comments we foster and adoptive dads receive are cordial, and respectful, there are always a handful that are not. Here’s a little insight into things you shouldn’t say to foster and adoptive dads on this special day (written, of course, for you to “share” with the people in your life who really don’t get it!) My brother-in-law’s heart probably drained from his chest like melted wax. Had his breath not been taken away by the off-handed comment, he would have found the words to speak, I’m sure. It was his […]

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Adoption, Forgotten Fridays, Foster ParentingJun. 1, 2018

Forgotten Friday | Making a Lifetime Commitment to Your Adopted Child

Too many children have lost their “forever family” when they were placed back into the system by their adoptive family. During my years working as a frontline case manager for children in state custody, I was appalled at the numbers of kids on my caseload, and fellow staff members’ caseloads, who had been adopted years prior and then were placed back into the system by their adoptive family. This is an unfortunate, almost unbelievable reality for too many children who were promised their “forever” home and had to learn the hard way that forever does not always mean what it […]

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Adoption, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference MondaysApr. 16, 2018

Make a Difference Monday | What I Really Want to Say to Little Man’s Birth Mom

Little man was born on July 24, 2013, and was placed with us on August 1, 2013. He spent his first week in the NICU going through withdrawal and wanted to be held all the time once we had him in our arms. We had no contact with the birth parents until the first mediation meeting that was held December 19, 2013, to discuss the surrender of his half-sibling for adoption with another foster family. I will never forget the first time I laid on eyes on the birth parents–or the emotions that went through me. For a few weeks, […]

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Adoption, Children in Foster Care, Family Support, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference Mondays, Ways to ServeApr. 9, 2018

Make a Difference Monday | 5 Areas of Need in Foster Care and Adoption

Have you considered what need in foster care or adoption you can meet? Or are you like I was a few years ago? I really had no idea of what foster care really was. And my thoughts about adoption completely focused on me and my wish to have a child of my own. I naively thought that if I weren’t interested in fostering or adopting then it was of no concern to me. I had a shallow understanding of the needs of foster care and adoption. If you don’t intend on meeting a need of foster care and adoption, you […]

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