Blog Archives

Category: Adoption

Adoption, Encouragement, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference MondaysSep. 17, 2018

Make a Difference Monday | Everyone Has a Story: Heartbreak and Hope, Part 2

(To read part one, click here) “She changed her mind.” I couldn’t believe it. I knew that this was so very common in domestic adoptions and yet, in this case, baby boy would immediately be put into the foster care system, and his mom did not want this. She had shared this with me before, yet she changed her mind. And her decision was final. I looked over at my friends who were standing outside the nursery. With so many emotions in my heart and tears in my eyes, I slowly walked to them and told them that it seemed like […]

Read more »
Adoption, Children in Foster Care, Forgotten Fridays, Foster ParentingJun. 15, 2018

Forgotten Friday | 7 Things You Should Never Say to Foster or Adoptive Dads on Father’s Day

This coming Sunday is Father’s Day. While most of the comments we foster and adoptive dads receive are cordial, and respectful, there are always a handful that are not. Here’s a little insight into things you shouldn’t say to foster and adoptive dads on this special day (written, of course, for you to “share” with the people in your life who really don’t get it!) My brother-in-law’s heart probably drained from his chest like melted wax. Had his breath not been taken away by the off-handed comment, he would have found the words to speak, I’m sure. It was his […]

Read more »
Adoption, Forgotten Fridays, Foster ParentingJun. 1, 2018

Forgotten Friday | Making a Lifetime Commitment to Your Adopted Child

Too many children have lost their “forever family” when they were placed back into the system by their adoptive family. During my years working as a frontline case manager for children in state custody, I was appalled at the numbers of kids on my caseload, and fellow staff members’ caseloads, who had been adopted years prior and then were placed back into the system by their adoptive family. This is an unfortunate, almost unbelievable reality for too many children who were promised their “forever” home and had to learn the hard way that forever does not always mean what it […]

Read more »
Adoption, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference MondaysApr. 16, 2018

Make a Difference Monday | What I Really Want to Say to Little Man’s Birth Mom

Little man was born on July 24, 2013, and was placed with us on August 1, 2013. He spent his first week in the NICU going through withdrawal and wanted to be held all the time once we had him in our arms. We had no contact with the birth parents until the first mediation meeting that was held December 19, 2013, to discuss the surrender of his half-sibling for adoption with another foster family. I will never forget the first time I laid on eyes on the birth parents–or the emotions that went through me. For a few weeks, […]

Read more »
Adoption, Children in Foster Care, Family Support, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference Mondays, Ways to ServeApr. 9, 2018

Make a Difference Monday | 5 Areas of Need in Foster Care and Adoption

Have you considered what need in foster care or adoption you can meet? Or are you like I was a few years ago? I really had no idea of what foster care really was. And my thoughts about adoption completely focused on me and my wish to have a child of my own. I naively thought that if I weren’t interested in fostering or adopting then it was of no concern to me. I had a shallow understanding of the needs of foster care and adoption. If you don’t intend on meeting a need of foster care and adoption, you […]

Read more »
Adoption, Children in Foster Care, Forgotten Fridays, Foster ParentingApr. 6, 2018

Forgotten Friday | Can You Ever Really Bond With An Older Child?

When it comes to adopting older children, there’s often a belief that, because they’ve been through so much, it’s impossible to form a healthy bond with them. We’ve discovered something different. In our 15 years of parenting we have had the honor of participating in the lives of 23 children. Most of them returned home or went on to be adopted by their forever families; eight of them have stayed forever. Before I became a parent of an older child, I didn’t think much about bonding and attachment. I am attached to my own parents, brothers and sisters. I have […]

Read more »
Adoption, Children in Foster Care, Family Support, Make a Difference MondaysApr. 2, 2018

Make a Difference Monday | Taking Care of Roots {a little lesson with my daughter}

My daughter came home from school this past week and said, “Mom, we played foster care at school today.” She then said, “I was the foster child and I had two moms.” I told her that sounded fun and interesting. We went on with the rest of the day and she didn’t mention it again. I thought about this conversation the remainder of the week. My daughter is very smart, willful and can be extremely challenging. She walks to the beat of her own drum and is fierce in so many ways. However, it seems that the older she gets, […]

Read more »
Adoption, Forgotten Fridays, Foster ParentingMar. 2, 2018

Forgotten Friday | The Moral Dilemma of a Foster Parent

The goal of foster care is reunification, until the state makes an argument that the parental rights should be terminated and a judge rules that decision. For us, Baby I was referred by the state with the intention that his goal will be adoption—so even though his current goal is reunification, we are hoping to eventually adopt him. Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear. Therein lies the dilemma—as a mom, I don’t want to see his BM fail. I want her to see how amazing he is, […]

Read more »
Adoption, Advocacy, Children in Foster Care, Make a Difference MondaysJan. 8, 2018

Make a Difference Monday | Why Foster Care Matters

I haven’t written much about our foster journey lately. Partly because there isn’t much new to report with S’s case, and partly because we just want to forget that S isn’t our biological child and move on with our lives as a family of five. However, we all know that this is not how the real world works. After a fantastic vacation to Disney where not one person asked us if S was our biological child (bliss!) we were right back to reality with doctor appointments and case worker visits. Even though we are working towards adoption with S, my […]

Read more »
Adoption, Encouragement, Forgotten Fridays, Foster ParentingDec. 8, 2017

Forgotten Friday | Children Are Worth It

I just can’t even tell you how much I love these kids. There are not enough words in my somewhat limited vocabulary that express how rich, deep, authentic and pure my love is for them. They came into my life without expectations. I didn’t care what race or gender they were, or what their histories consisted of. No expectations, just hopeful anticipation. It took me a while (like twenty-five years since the age that barrenness interrupted my life) to hold a baby and feel that smothering, warm and wonderful feeling of motherhood. Sure, I was a foster mother. Sure, my […]

Read more »
 
Page: 1 2 3 4 5

Site Search

Connect with your Area!

Featured Links

Gobena Coffee Lifesong for Orphans Podcast