Blog Archives

Category: Advocacy

Advocacy, Children in Foster Care, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference MondaysMar. 26, 2018

Make a Difference Monday | Because Jesus

I’m sitting in a hospital bed a few feet away from a baby that I’ll most likely never watch grow into a toddler. The hiss of oxygen, the alarming monitors and constant stream of visitors in yellow disposable gowns are our current reality. I’m exhausted and my legs hurt. The interrupted sleep is the only thing that reminds me of home. I’ve missed afternoon chats and homework with my big kids, five bedtimes with all of them, hugs and kisses and playtime. Last night, they came up to visit for some face to face time. We enjoyed a delicious hospital […]

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Advocacy, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference Mondays, Vulnerable ParentsMar. 5, 2018

Make a Difference Monday | If Only You Knew

I feel your heavy stares as I pull out my government issued benefits card to pay for the few groceries I have in my cart full of home goods and clothes. I know what you’re thinking, “This is what’s wrong with America!” We give food stamps and welfare to people who use and abuse the system, just like you assumed I was doing. My cart wasn’t filled with necessities to feed my family, it wasn’t overflowing with diapers, wipes, and formula, so you must have thought that I was working the system, taking the hard earned tax payers’ dollars and […]

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Advocacy, Forgotten Fridays, Foster Parenting, Vulnerable ParentsJan. 19, 2018

Forgotten Friday | Birth Parents Are Not the Enemy

I’ll never forget the first phone call we shared. She was very nervous and so was I. She had her stereotypes of folks like me and I had mine of folks like her, but when our lives suddenly collided, everything changed. “Hi Sandra*. I’m Jami.” (*name changed for privacy) Just a few days earlier, I was pacing the floor. I was nervous, excited and clueless about the craziness we were about to step into. When the caseworker pulled up, I ran out to the car and for the first time saw, Dayd (3 yrs) and Bobby (7 mo). Oh Dayd, […]

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Advocacy, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference MondaysJan. 15, 2018

Make a Difference Monday | Just Mercy.

Through foster care, I have come to mother children of all ages and races. And it’s opening my mind, my heart, my eyes to realities I never knew. It’s shattering my rose-colored glasses. And I’m left searching for a new lens to view and know this world. One that sees past my own privilege. I’m grateful for authors like Bryan Stevenson who share and teach me through books like Just Mercy. He gives a powerful glimpse into the racial bias of America’s justice system. And an inspiring reflection that pulls the reader from devastation to hope. I find myself coming […]

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Advocacy, Forgotten Fridays, Vulnerable ParentsJan. 12, 2018

Forgotten Friday | Connections in Care

I met my first birth mom four years ago. I remember the drive, the feelings and her face. I got her little girl dressed, drove to the mall and unloaded the car with nervous hands and an even shakier heart. As I rounded the corner of the playground where our first meeting was set to take place, I felt my own insecurity surging unsteadily. I was met with emotions that had never even grazed the borders of my mama heart. I watched her face light up as she saw her baby again. She became, in that moment, just another mama. […]

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Adoption, Advocacy, Children in Foster Care, Make a Difference MondaysJan. 8, 2018

Make a Difference Monday | Why Foster Care Matters

I haven’t written much about our foster journey lately. Partly because there isn’t much new to report with S’s case, and partly because we just want to forget that S isn’t our biological child and move on with our lives as a family of five. However, we all know that this is not how the real world works. After a fantastic vacation to Disney where not one person asked us if S was our biological child (bliss!) we were right back to reality with doctor appointments and case worker visits. Even though we are working towards adoption with S, my […]

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Advocacy, Children in Foster Care, Forgotten Fridays, Foster ParentingNov. 17, 2017

Forgotten Friday | Recognizing Signs of Sexual Abuse as a Foster Parent

Foster parents have a duty to be an advocate for the children in their care. Often, these children come from troubled homes and have been victims of physical, emotional, and sexual abuse. While signs of physical abuse are fairly obvious, indications that a child has suffered sexual abuse can be less clear. There are several indicators of sexual abuse, that, taken as a grouping or pattern, should prompt foster parents to inform a pediatrician and law enforcement. Four Possible Signs of Abuse The signs below would be considered post-abuse, as opposed to signs that abuse has very recently (within 24-48 […]

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Advocacy, Family Support, Forgotten Fridays, Foster ParentingJun. 30, 2017

Forgotten Friday | The American Mission Field

We spent some time last week with a few missionaries. They were at church as part of an annual celebration of support and awareness for worldwide missions. We met in small groups for a picnic and some shared personal stories from their ministries. A question was posed to one of the missionaries, “What is your greatest need right now?” The answer didn’t amaze me, it actually affirmed my suspicions–native workers. This guy was from a foreign country and his greatest need was for his own people to become aware of and respond to the needs in their very community. That’s […]

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Advocacy, Forgotten Fridays, Foster ParentingApr. 28, 2017

Forgotten Friday | Can I Ask You Something? (Single Mom Edition)

The nurse and doctor exchanged a look—the kind of look that said, “Are you going to explain this to her, or should I?” We had been making small talk about my son—what grade he was in, the kinds of books he likes, and the silly things he says—before she started asking me about my medical history. Being a life-long single, I answered one of the most personal questions with “never.” That’s when I derailed her. It’s cool, y’all. I know how this works. I know where babies come from. Because L. is “peach” (as he says) like me, people assume […]

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Advocacy, Children in Foster Care, Foster Parenting, Journey Bags, Make a Difference MondaysMar. 27, 2017

Make a Difference Monday | The Journey of the Bag, the Boy, and Beyond

The baby boy was just under 4 weeks old when we picked him up from a doctor’s appointment and brought him home. It would be another day or two before a caseworker was assigned to the little guy. By the time the caseworker visited, we had already bought diapers, wipes, formula, a diaper bag, and other essentials. The baby’s birth parents had sent two tubs of clothes–enough to keep him clothed for quite a while. When the caseworker brought a backpack full of items for him, I was very appreciative. I also felt a little guilty; surely, there was some […]

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