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Category: Children in Foster Care

Children in Foster Care, Forgotten Fridays, Foster ParentingMar. 13, 2015

Forgotten Friday: “Foster Child” Doesn’t Mean “Unwanted Child”

Originally posted at Her View From Home Our first fostering experience was a baptism by fire into the world of child welfare. It was a NICU infant. It was an ICWA (Indian Child Welfare Act) case. The family had a lengthy history with the court system. There was a case plan and paperwork and visitation and court dates and that was all just in the first few weeks of our life adjusting to a preemie in the house. While we had had a hand in parenting lots of boys through our group home work and the adoption of our first child, […]

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Children in Foster Care, Forgotten Fridays, Foster ParentingMar. 6, 2015

Forgotten Friday: Believe Me, I’m Attached

“But don’t you get attached? I would.” I can’t count the number of times I hear something similar to this a week. I was watching a talk show last week that did a feature on foster care. After several minutes of talking about the need for more foster families and even specific stories one in which a 4 year old died, the talk show host asked a foster family, “But…don’t you get attached.” You just reported that a child died. Died. But you are wondering how a family can do something that makes them sad? Seriously? Would a paramedic say, […]

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Children in Foster Care, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference MondaysMar. 2, 2015

Make a Difference Monday: For All the Times I Doubt

It’s there. Buried underneath piles of french fries, cookie-crumbled ice cream, bacon burgers, and hot apple pies. Beneath the smiles and laughter. Jumping off swings into a pile of pine bark. Riding metal playground equipment until the springs nearly break. The prayer of the oldest boy before the meal. It’s unspoken– but it still rides the swells in my heart. I say, How was your day at school today? He responds with dark, averted eyes, smile suddenly vacant, Not good. I don’t want to talk about it. The undercurrent trickles. His breathing shallow as he wildly takes ownership of the […]

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Children in Foster Care, Foster Care Workers, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference Mondays, Vulnerable ParentsFeb. 23, 2015

Make a Difference Monday: Fostering Hope

Ever wonder what it is like to be without hope?  I don’t mean those momentary spaces in our timelines where we are feeling a little confused about what our next steps are supposed to be.  I mean truly without a sense of hope for the future.  I have talked with far too many young people in foster care who have no hope of a future, family, or anything better for that matter. This week marked a movement in America called the National Prayer Vigil for Foster Children week.  It is part of recognizing May as the National Foster Care month.  […]

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Children in Foster CareFeb. 20, 2015

Forgotten Friday: Inescapable Clouds

The sunshine, warmer temperatures and spring storms of May once brought me both into and out of some of my life’s most intense storms. Until I was 12 years old, I’d lived in a storm of abuse, alcoholism, domestic violence, and negativity that was my home – my family. I’d been introduced to sex too early in far too many experiences. I’d witnessed my father crack my mother’s head on a kitchen cabinet and tip a table full of our dinner over for one too few pork chops. I’d heard of my own worthlessness and stupidity more than I could […]

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Advocacy, Advocate Wednesdays, Children in Foster Care, Vulnerable ParentsFeb. 18, 2015

Advocate Wednesday: My Days as a Foster Care Intern

As an intern you do a lot of observing.  You have the opportunity to sit back and watch as every piece of the puzzle is laid out.  When I stepped into juvenile court for the first time I was unprepared for what was to happen before me.  I had read many different stories about court experiences and each one has made me tear up and my heart ache.  The tears, the pain, the broken hearts that come from those court rooms are a lot to take in. In the beginning of my internship, I was introduced to a young teenage boy […]

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Advocacy, Children in Foster Care, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference MondaysFeb. 16, 2015

Make a Difference Monday: So you want to adopt from foster care

When people tell me they are considering adoption as a way to grow their family, I encourage them to consider adopting from foster care. There are a lot of benefits to adopting from foster care. It is essentially free and there are many kids in need of loving families. You can have access to lots of information about their medical history, in many states you live with them for six months before your adoption can actually be made legal (so you know them pretty well), and there are options for both open adoptions or adoptions that are more closed (“open” and […]

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Children in Foster Care, Foster Care Workers, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference MondaysFeb. 9, 2015

Make a Difference Monday: For My Fellow Child Welfare Professionals & Foster Families

I watched out the window as one foster family loaded three little ones into their car, spent time talking to the other foster family, and eventually drove off.  I thought to myself, “I bet those children have no idea that the family who has tucked them in bed the last few months of their lives will no longer be tucking them in.” I do not blame the foster family – life happens, situations lean themselves to not being a good match, often trauma is so intense that it does not create a safe situation, and after all, we are all […]

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Children in Foster Care, Forgotten FridaysFeb. 6, 2015

Forgotten Friday: Three Different Girls, Three Very Different Lives

Originally posted on Jami’s personal blog on January 18th, 2012 At 11:30 this afternoon, I drove over to my little girl’s school – signed myself in and walked up behind her. “Hey there!” I whispered. Turning around, she squealed, Mommy!! and threw her arms around me! We were going on a field trip! I love field trips – not because of the event itself – or the squirming children – or the headache that often hits me right in the middle of the experience! – I love field trips because I get to spend that one on one time with […]

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Children in Foster Care, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference MondaysFeb. 2, 2015

Make a Difference Monday: From Buster B.

From Buster B (used with her permission) She’s nine. I met her six months ago. In an instant she was asked to move into a stranger’s home and leave every, single thing she knew behind. There were no answers to her questions. No reasoning for her why’s. In a moment she was expected to adjust and adapt once again, and everyone told her how grateful she must be to have a safe home like the Lumpkins. And she stuffed her dismay down deep, pushed her desires to grasp and understand below her ability to survive. There are moments when I’ve […]

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