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Category: Forgotten Fridays

Forgotten FridaysSep. 28, 2012

Forgotten Fridays: From a foster mama’s heart

A Kingdom- Minded Day in Family Court I’ve always hated family court days. The emotional weight over my own children’s cases that those days hold are heavy for me, but it’s also the atmosphere, the penetrating functionality of lives that hang in the balance, cluttered by consequences, paperwork, and waiting, sprinkled with the influence of social workers, lawyers, and judges – everyone attempting to do their jobs well. Almost exactly a year ago was my first day in family court. We were scheduled to send Baby M home, but waiting turned into four hours. Parents walking in and out, and children rolling on the floor, whining because […]

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Forgotten FridaysSep. 21, 2012

Forgotten Friday: Choosing to See

Sometimes I need little, subtle reminders in my day that God is good, when it feels like I am drowning in devastation with the families I work with. I had a horrible moment this week.  One of my kids sees a counselor on a weekly basis.  This counselor walked into my office and he told me some of the worst words… “Did you know he has been tied up to a chair and beaten with a belt on multiple occasions?” Really? It doesn’t even seem real.  How does this even happen?  Can this be real?  Who does this? Seriously.  It is moments like this that […]

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Forgotten FridaysSep. 7, 2012

Forgotten Friday: The Less Traveled Road

This Road For as long as memory serves, I can recall us “good Christians” always asking God for some sign to reveal His will for our life- something tangible, an audible voice, a recognizable reminder that He is here with us, holding our hand, leading the way, steering the wheel. I’ve even been guilty myself of making deals with Him. “God, if you will do this for me, then I will do this for you. ‘Let this cup pass from me,’ and then I will know you exist and care for me.” Or, something along those lines-my decisions always predicated […]

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Forgotten FridaysAug. 31, 2012

Forgotten Friday: "How can you give them back?"

I found this quote on the Augusta County, VA TFI newsletter from a foster mom named Melissa and I just had to share it! “When out and about in public I am frequently stopped by folks wanting to ooogle over my beautiful 2 year old and 7 month old babies. Upon finding out that I am their foster mom it is common that the well meaning stranger will sigh loudly and say something like, “OHHHHH, I could NEVER do that! I just could never give them back.” Giving a knowing smile and a sympathetic nod to acknowledge that risk I reply: “Yes, but then […]

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Forgotten FridaysAug. 17, 2012

Forgotten Friday: from the heart of a caseworker

Sometimes it hurts bad. So bad. You wish you could take their pain away, and you would sacrifice anything to make that happen….. Today, I was transporting an 11 year old boy, who has experienced more abandonment in his life than what I can hardly wrap my mind around. He was in the foster system when he was younger, was adopted, and as of last fall is back in the system from his adoptive family. Yes, an disruptive adoption for physical abuse. He then moved in with a relative foster mother, who this spring, said she couldn’t handle him anymore, […]

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Forgotten FridaysJul. 13, 2012

Forgotten Fridays: Anything but Natural

We recently signed our renewal contract as foster parents. There’s a line in the agreement that states, “The foster parent will care for the placed child as he or she would care for other children in his or her home.” I was talking with Baby J’s social worker, and she was asking various questions about how things were going, and I remarked, “You know, foster parenting is one of the most unnatural things you can do.” “What do you mean?” she asked. My heart’s response: In this season, I am his mother, her mother. I’ve agreed to care with my […]

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Forgotten FridaysJul. 6, 2012

Forgotten Fridays: "My Foster Parent Faith Walk"

After our third child was born, Mike and I made a decision–if God called us to have any more children, we would adopt.  After several years of prayer, we knew our calling: foster and adopt a local child. We have now been licensed foster parents for over two years. So, how many kids now live in our home? Three–the same three we’ve always had. Here we sit, our family of five, and wonder if we chose the right path. Used the right agency. Made the right decision. Billboards screamed “Foster Kids are Our Kids!” The tears welled, my heart ached, […]

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Forgotten FridaysJun. 29, 2012

Forgotten Friday’s: It is only a season…It is all a gift (my current mantra)

This life, this season, where I am right now…I have a tendency to bless it and curse it in the same breath. The other day, I was walking into the CPS office with my kids – foster and adopted – so they (fosters) could have a bio visit. There was a little boy crying and crying, his foster dad was stoically putting him in the car while the boy’s bio mom stood behind the dad and cried. The boy kept saying, “I don’t wanna leave!” I thought, I hate this place. Hate that I know these things happen, and by […]

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Forgotten Fridays, Foster ParentingJun. 23, 2012

Forgotten Fridays: Foster parenting

As I’m writing, I’m looking out over a crystal clear pool of water with palm trees swaying in the distance. Vacations are a wonderful gift from God — a time to slow down, refocus, and refresh. This time away from our kids has also made me very contemplative. We have six children at home, three of whom we are fostering. I live with the reality that three of “my” children I have to hold more loosely than the others. With three of them, I have to be more cautious with my words. I cannot tell them, “I am your mommy […]

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Forgotten Fridays, Foster ParentingJun. 22, 2012

Forgotten Fridays: the final goodbye

Lisa stayed home with Thomas, who suffered from a stomach ailment this morning. I took the others to church. Mary and I headed to the sanctuary, while Luke walked the foster daughters to their class. A few minutes later, Luke stood beside our aisle with the youngest of them, Jennifer. “She wanted to come sit with you,” he said. This seemed especially odd to me since she loved her class and had never missed it to sit through a sermon-a fiercely independent child, who at least to this point, maintained a much greater affinity with the wife I left behind. […]

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