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Category: Forgotten Fridays

Advocacy, Forgotten Fridays, Foster Parenting, UncategorizedOct. 7, 2016

Forgotten Friday | Why Foster Care Isn’t Adoption

Before I was a foster mom…I find myself starting lots of sentences off like that these days. There’s so much I am learning and seeing and realizing I was wrong about. Before I was a foster mom, foster care and adoption rolled out of my mouth in the same breath. They were like cute little siblings that mirrored this beautiful picture of God’s great redemption and necessary rescuing. I thought they were so similar in their efforts to reveal who Jesus is to a broken world. And they do that. for sure. But that’s where their similarities end for me. […]

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Adoption, Encouragement, Forgotten Fridays, Foster ParentingSep. 30, 2016

Forgotten Friday | Adoption is Not Second Best

Maybe it’s my “mom hair” (thanks, New York Times, for that label) or maybe it’s that I look perpetually tired that encourages near strangers to ask me how many kids I have. At my last dental cleaning, my hygienist (whom I had only met one time prior) asked this very question. “Two,” I replied. “Oh! That’s great!! How old are they?!” “Seven.” I tried to stick with one-word answers because A) she had her hands in my mouth and B) our kids’ entrance to our family is complicated, and I often don’t divulge the details to strangers because I don’t […]

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Children in Foster Care, Family Support, Forgotten Fridays, Foster ParentingSep. 23, 2016

Forgotten Friday | Can I Ask You Something?

Our first day at the park together People have lots of questions about my little guy, so here’s the answer to a few of the most common: How long will you have him? I don’t know. Will you be able to adopt him? I don’t know. When will you know? I don’t know. There are a lot of unknowns in the world of foster care, and it’s tough on this planner! I mean, I’m ready to buy us tickets to Disney World for Christmas next year because I know he would love it, but I honestly don’t know what next […]

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Advocacy, Children in Foster Care, Forgotten Fridays, Foster Parenting, Uncategorized, Vulnerable ParentsSep. 16, 2016

Forgotten Friday | The Cause of Foster Children

I worked a booth for recruiting foster families at a local convention this weekend. To be honest, while the time I was there, I can count on one hand the number of folks who actually engaged me in conversation about the need for foster homes in our communities. I get it. Foster parenting is certainly not for the faint of heart, but I found myself considering why it is important for Christians to step into the world of abuse and neglect. The thought, “If Christians do not take up the cause of foster children and pray for them, then who […]

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Children in Foster Care, Forgotten Fridays, Foster ParentingSep. 9, 2016

Forgotten Friday | Remembering the Kids Who Have Moved On

In the days before our first foster daughter—the one who made me a mom—left to be reunited with an extended family member, I had my husband help me paint her hand pink and press it onto white card stock. I didn’t have a plan for that handprint yet but I knew I needed something more than the 1000s of photos I took to remember her—something I could trace my fingertips across when I was aching from missing her and wondering how she was doing. I also saved the top of the artificial hot pink daisy she had been playing with […]

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Children in Foster Care, Forgotten Fridays, Foster ParentingSep. 2, 2016

Forgotten Friday | Surprise! The Cause of Your Child’s Misbehavior Might Not Be What You Think

Our son just turned four-years-old. He is bright, funny, adventuresome, lovable, good-looking, a good story-teller. I could go on and on. I tell people that I can brag on him because he doesn’t have our genes! Lately though his bad behavior has concerned Danielle and I. Sure some of his behavior is typical four-year-old behavior. But this is more intense, frequent, and long-lasting. Photo Credit: Chance Agrella via Compfight cc When our son yells at me, struggles in social settings or with sleep, refuses to listen or respond when I am talking to him…I admit my first thought and reaction […]

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Education, Family Support, Forgotten Fridays, Foster ParentingAug. 26, 2016

Forgotten Friday | 5 Ways Foster Care Can Destroy A Healthy Marriage (and how to prevent it from happening to you)

If there’s one thing that pays the price the most in foster care (or adoption), it’s the health of your marriage. How do you maintain the most important relationship you have and care for the children who have been placed in your home? We stood on opposite ends of our kitchen staring at one another, tired, defeated, and barely awake. The sad part? It was 8pm on a Saturday. We weren’t this tired because we were well into our 30’s. We could have made a great case for ourselves if so. No, this was the work of parenting. But not […]

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Adoption, Forgotten Fridays, Foster Parenting, Vulnerable ParentsAug. 19, 2016

Forgotten Friday | The Bittersweet Nature of Adoption

When we began our journey into foster care and adoption I had no idea what would lie before us. We focused on our needs and wants—we wanted a family—with a tinge of social justice—we needed to care for orphans. We definitely looked at adoption through rose-colored glasses not understanding all that accompanied the journey. CPS placed our son with us when he was about eight-months-old. Immediately both Danielle and I leapt into protective mode. Someone injured this little guy, and we felt called to protect him from further harm. Naturally we intended to protect him from those who caused him […]

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Forgotten Fridays, Foster Parenting, Vulnerable ParentsAug. 12, 2016

Forgotten Friday | I still think of you, birth mother

 {photo credit: www.freedomphotography.smugmug.com} I still think of you, birth mother. You are always with me. Each embrace, each kiss, each smile, and each moment of growth, I think of you. This week marks the fifth year since the adoption of my son…our son, and yet; I still think of you. It seems like a lifetime ago since we talked about him. I remember our talks while taking turns rocking him. We were in love with the same child. Our love for him opened the door for our relationship. You are the one who started loving him the moment you knew […]

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Advocacy, Children in Foster Care, Forgotten Fridays, Foster Parenting, Ways to ServeAug. 5, 2016

Forgotten Friday | Why Churches Need to Step Up: Increasing Foster Homes in Our Nation

Recently, I have been overwhelmed with some disturbing facts related to our nations foster care system. Not facts related to the process, but facts related to foster homes. Or, should I say, the lack of foster homes across the nation. Let’s focus on Arizona first. During a 6 month period over 25,000 calls were received by the Child Abuse Hotline that met criteria for a DCS report, increasing the number of children placed in out-of-home care over 1000 for a total of nearly 17,000 children (CASA of Arizona). It is hard to even fathom these numbers. Where do these 17,000 […]

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