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Category: Make a Difference Mondays

Children in Foster Care, Encouragement, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference MondaysJul. 17, 2017

Make a Difference Monday | When You Understand Trauma, You Understand A Whole New World.

It took us a while to get there, but after years of parenting children from traumatic places, we finally had our eyes opened up. It became a game-changer for us, and our parenting. There are only 3 things I would go back in time and change if I had the power to do so. The first was field day in 6th grade. The event was cancelled due to rain and all students who decided not to come to school were excused. But I didn’t know this so I got on the bus anyways. Fail! The second was when I began my first […]

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Encouragement, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference MondaysJul. 10, 2017

Make a Difference Monday | True Confessions of a Foster Mama

I’m drinking my daily cup of coffee…finally. Ahhhhh, the therapeutic effects of a warm cup of joe resting in my palm. Feels so good. I had to reheat it in the microwave, gasp, because now its almost bedtime. I would have sipped it down this morning but my body refused to move to the rhythm of my alarm dinging and vibrating my comfy bed. I was up every 2-3 hours holding another mama’s baby. My husband and I are supposed to work in shifts through the darkness of the night. But since I heard the cries as he snored puffed […]

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Children in Foster Care, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference Mondays, Vulnerable ParentsJul. 3, 2017

Make a Difference Monday | Liberty — part one

The roads of the small town would’ve been saturated with plump pumpkins, hay bales, and corn husk figures on that day in late October 2010–intersections and front yards plastered with signs advertising Fall Festivals for chili-cook offs, costume contests, and children’s inflatables, as the crisp air wafted cotton candy and caramel apples. The woman was likely surrounded by her two young sons, their hearts bursting with excitement, as they awaited the birth of their infant sister. She probably labored in the conventional blue-dotted gown, her bottle-blonde hair perhaps pulled back loosely into a ponytail. Life is ironic. No coincidences or […]

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Children in Foster Care, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference MondaysJun. 26, 2017

Make a Difference Monday | Imagining Life Without Our Foster Princess

Our foster princess sat in her bed last night and after we went through our nightly ritual of Bible reading and song singing, it was time to say our prayers. Without hesitation she asked God, like she has done every night for nearly 26 months, if she could stay with us forever. I would be lying if I told you that I didn’t silently say the same prayer at the same time. I can’t imagine my world without her in it. I can’t imagine not hearing her giggles. Watching her kick her butt with her feet when she runs. Listening […]

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Children in Foster Care, Family Support, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference MondaysJun. 19, 2017

Make a Difference Monday | Sometimes It’s the Parent Who Needs to Regulate

Isn’t it a shock when you see yourself on video? Often we say, “I didn’t know I looked or sounded like that.” We aren’t aware of our tone, our posture, our facial expressions, or even how we communicate our emotions. Part of self-awareness is recognizing that what we think or feel on the inside doesn’t always translate accurately through our voice, emotions, and actions. Or do they? Remember Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood? I can hear him now singing his simple greeting song: “It’s a beautiful day in this neighborhood. It’s a beautiful day for a neighbor. Could you be mine? Would […]

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Encouragement, Family Support, Foster Care Affects on Kids Already in Your Home, Make a Difference MondaysJun. 12, 2017

Make a Difference Monday | How To Help Typically Developing Children Cope With Raising a Non-Typical Child

One of the biggest issues adoptive parents face, is helping typically-developing children cope with the struggles and behaviors of non-typically developing children. But there is a way to find balance. When our first daughter was born, everything was just as it should be. She was full-term. Her birth-mom did not drink or smoke or use drugs. She took her pre-natal vitamins and ate a healthy diet. Our daughter was placed in our arms just minutes after birth. From the moment she entered the world, all was right. She developed appropriately. She walked and talked on time. She ate all the […]

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Encouragement, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference MondaysJun. 5, 2017

Make a Difference Monday | Wanted: Parents Willing to Get Too Attached

*It has been more than two years since I wrote this post and it ran on The Gospel Coalition and CBMW blog. At the time, we were preparing to say goodbye to our son. Now, years later, we have finalized his adoption into our family. We are grateful to God and amazed by his faithfulness, provision and working on our son’s behalf! I pray our story would encourage you and cause you to ask whether you too could risk getting “too attached” for the sake of a child in need. – – – – – – It has been almost one […]

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Encouragement, Family Support, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference MondaysMay. 29, 2017

Make a Difference Monday | How My Friends Taught Me to Grieve

I sat down to write something today, but then the doorbell rang. It was a delivery for my family of an edible bouquet. Seriously, is there anything better than something beautiful and also edible that comes as a total surprise from people who love you? So here I sit with tears about the sweet ways my friends have stepped up and loved my family well and instead of whatever it was I thought I might write today, this is what I want to tell you about. My family has been through a tough time the last few months which culminated […]

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Foster Care Affects on Kids Already in Your Home, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference MondaysMay. 22, 2017

Make a Difference Monday | “You’re a Good Mom” {Perception & Misconception}

“You’re a good mom.” I hear those words very often, and nearly everywhere I go–Costco, Target, church, the grocery store, the doctor’s office…you get the idea. And I suppose the strangers’ words come out naturally when they see a gal with a 16-month-old on one hip, a 21-month-old on the other, a three-year-old tagging alongside. But while I hear the words, they aren’t being said to me. The words are being said to my 16-year-old daughter, Kaitlin. Kaitlin, my oldest child who–along with younger siblings Connor and Kylie–has spent six years sharing her home and life with foster siblings. She was 10 when […]

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Children in Foster Care, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference MondaysMay. 15, 2017

Make a Difference Monday | I’m an Inadequate Dad

“We don’t have a dad in our family,” L. remarked to me one night as I put him to bed. That’s right, bud. “But that’s kind of dangerous because dads are stronger than moms.” Yeah, that’s true. “So what if there was a bear and a wolf and a coyote?” If there was a bear and a wolf and a coyote, we would go inside and lock the door. “Oh, yeah. That would work.” It’s something that comes up from time to time. L. craves attention from and the reassuring presence of men. Just today I was helping him climb a […]

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