Blog Archives

Category: Vulnerable Parents

Forgotten Fridays, Foster Parenting, Vulnerable ParentsAug. 12, 2016

Forgotten Friday | I still think of you, birth mother

 {photo credit: www.freedomphotography.smugmug.com} I still think of you, birth mother. You are always with me. Each embrace, each kiss, each smile, and each moment of growth, I think of you. This week marks the fifth year since the adoption of my son…our son, and yet; I still think of you. It seems like a lifetime ago since we talked about him. I remember our talks while taking turns rocking him. We were in love with the same child. Our love for him opened the door for our relationship. You are the one who started loving him the moment you knew […]

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Advocacy, Children in Foster Care, Education, Encouragement, Family Support, Foster Care Affects on Kids Already in Your Home, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference Mondays, Vulnerable ParentsAug. 1, 2016

Make a Difference Monday | That Time I Hated Being a Foster Parent… and Why It’s Worth It Anyway

“I hate being a foster parent. I hate it!” I sobbed to my 11-year-old daughter on our front porch a few weeks ago. I’m aware of how wrong this is on multiple levels. The thing is, nothing terrible had happened that day. It wasn’t a day of several kids vomiting. No one had soiled himself. There were no out-of-the-usual squabbles. It had actually been a good day, and one worth celebrating. We had our annual awards ceremony for the AWANA program – a ceremony I both anticipated and dreaded, as this was each child’s last year in their clubs. I […]

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Children in Foster Care, Encouragement, Forgotten Fridays, Foster Parenting, Vulnerable ParentsJul. 29, 2016

Forgotten Friday | Dear (Foster) Momma of a Stranger’s Child {Letter #6}

Dear Foster Momma of a Stranger’s Child, You drove away the other day, didn’t you? You packed up your car with a year or two worth of memories of the child you have loved on, held on for one last time, kissed goodbye, and drove away. You just wanted to turn the car around. You wanted to grab that little one, and hold on. You needed to feel that sweet embrace one last time, but you could not. As the miles began to separate you from the child you have called your own, the tears began to flow. You held […]

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Children in Foster Care, Forgotten Fridays, Foster Parenting, Vulnerable ParentsJul. 22, 2016

Forgotten Friday | Letting Go: When Foster Care Hurts

Granting yourself permission to love and grieve. The journey of foster care is not free of pain, nor deep hurt, in the least bit. But allowing yourself to feel the emotions that come from loving a child from a difficult place may fill you up more than you realize. 20 years ago. “Let go!” the camp counselor shouted encouragingly from 100 feet below. With one hand gripping the zip line tightly and the other hand securely fastened to the tower, I stared at the tops of the trees below. Adrenaline coursed through me and my senses were completely on alert. The […]

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Advocacy, Children in Foster Care, Encouragement, Family Support, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference Mondays, Vulnerable ParentsJun. 27, 2016

Make a Difference Monday | 21 Things I Love About Fostering

We’ve been fostering children for two years now, during which time we’ve had eight children in our home as long-term placements, plus over a dozen more for shorter “respite” stays. I’ve been pretty transparent about the hardships of foster parenting, even as I try to be quick to turn my attention back to the ultimate God-ordained purpose behind it. I do that because I refuse to varnish the truth; foster parenting is not a walk in the park. There’s pain and there’s angst. There’s too much information and not enough patience. There are squabbles and arguments. There’s selfishness and spite. But there are plenty of things to love about […]

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Advocacy, Aging Out Youth, Children in Foster Care, Family Support, Foster Care Workers, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference Mondays, Mentoring, Vulnerable Parents, Ways to ServeJun. 13, 2016

Make a Difference Monday | It’s Not the Thought That Counts

Today I asked a friend, “Does it count as a workout in the fact that I brought my gym bag with me but don’t actually workout?”  She giggled and as I sat thinking through that saying, “It’s the thought that counts,” I realized, of course the thought doesn’t count, my body isn’t changing in any way. The same is true in foster care.  So many people think about fostering or serving the foster care community, but if you think about it… If it were the thought that counted, there would be an abundance of foster care workers feeling encouraged and […]

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Advocacy, Aging Out Youth, Children in Foster Care, Education, Forgotten Fridays, Vulnerable ParentsJun. 10, 2016

Forgotten Friday | Everyone Has a Story: The Little Boy With No Name

My heart breaks every time I think about this little 8 year old boy who lives at the residential treatment center (RTC) in our community. The majority of the children living at the RTC are in (or have been in) foster care. Most of them have been in and out of up to 7 or 8 foster homes before coming to the RTC where they get 24 hour care in a therapeutic environment. Many of these kids have experienced trauma, abuse, and neglect in more extreme forms then those in traditional foster homes. Some have been in the RTC for […]

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Children in Foster Care, Family Support, Forgotten Fridays, Foster Parenting, Vulnerable ParentsJun. 3, 2016

Forgotten Friday | Because I’m a Broken Mama

Our journey through foster care has been refining and revealing of so many ‘heart deficits.’ The further we get into this the more clearly we understand the risk we have taken in loving a child who may leave us one day…. and the more clearly we understand why God has asked us to. My hope when we originally sought foster certification was to grow our family by adopting a child through foster care. I believe fully that if the Lord allows it this may happen one day with one or more future foster children, however, adoption is no longer the […]

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Advocacy, Foster Parenting, Make a Difference Mondays, Vulnerable ParentsMay. 16, 2016

Make a Difference Monday | A Letter To Our Foster Kids’ Mom

Dear ……, I realized that I know a lot about your kids now and honestly a lot about you, from social workers, probably more than you think a stranger should know about you. And I am just that, a stranger. You don’t know me and you don’t even know who is taking care of your kids. I hope that can change, when the time is right. I was scared of this at first, but I hope we can meet face to face at some point so you can lay eyes on one of the random humans that have been charged […]

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Advocacy, Encouragement, Family Support, Forgotten Fridays, Foster Parenting, Vulnerable ParentsMay. 6, 2016

Forgotten Friday | A Love Letter to Our Biological Mother

Dear B, It’s Mother’s Day. And this is the first one since you surrendered your parental rights and now our children are on the brink of our forever family. Not an easy day for either of us. This Mother’s Day, I feel particularly wrecked. So many people wishing me a happy day, many times over. They know a small part of our story and they know five children–3 biological and 2 that we share–call me mama. But they don’t know the whole story. Our children–all of them–have had to endure brokenness in order to have redemption. They’ve all loved and […]

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